Trevor Lawrence Has Laser Eyes

Crypto QB, Supreme Court boner, Pussification of SNL, Nasdaq psychedelics, ??????????

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  1. NFL x CRYPTO: Trevor Lawrence Has Laser Eyes1

  2. POLITICS: Supreme Court Rules in Favor of Scumbag

  3. AYFKM: Musk Triggers SNL, Cast Gets “Safe Space”

  4. FINANCE: First Cannabis, Now This!? Wall Street is Experimenting with Psychedelics

  5. ???????????: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


NFL x CRYPTO

Trevor Lawrence Has Laser Eyes

On Thursday, Trevor Lawrence was selected by the Jacksonville Jaguars with the first overall pick in the 2021 NFL Draft.

Three days before that, he signed a sponsorship deal with Blockfolio where he announced he’d be receiving his draft signing bonus in cryptocurrencies.

It will be a combination of Bitcoin ($BTC), Ethereum ($ETH), and Solana ($SOL).

i.e. serious cryptocurrencies, definitely NOT Asscoin ($ASS), Elongate ($ELONGATE), Pirate ($ARRR) PooCoin ($POOCOIN), or Cumrocket ($CUMMIES). Yes, these are real and the links are safe.

Estimated signing bonus in real life dollars = $22,630,055.

Hypothetically, that portfolio is already worth $24,546,078 (up 8.5%).

That’s assuming even distribution across $BTC, $ETH, $SOL.

It wasn’t his only big crypto play of the week either. The day after announcing his deal with Blockfolio, he teamed up with Topps for an NFT “drop” (auction). The most expensive “piece” went for roughly $225,000…

I LOVE these moves by Sunshine.

Yes, putting all your signing bonus into crypto is a little crazy, but so are the potential returns. I would’ve done 25% tops, but that’s just me.

It’s also a signing BONUS.

He’s already signed the run-of-the-mill deals with Gatorade, Adidas, and Fanatics so the income will be flowing in actual dollars as well.

Then there’s the money he’ll earn from his day job as an NFL QUARTERBACK, mind you.

If the other income is properly managed, why not take some risk on speculative assets with huge upside?

He can afford it. It’s not going to bankrupt him, but it does give him a chance at netting some FAT gains.

Welcome to diversification in 2021.

In other NFL-crypto-related news: Kansas City Chiefs tight end Sean Culkin said he’ll be receiving the entirety of his $920K salary in Bitcoin this season.

Why?

“It makes the most logical sense to be paid in sound money that I believe protects its purchasing power over time.”

There’s measuring risk/reward (Lawrence) and there’s full crypto (Culkin).

Never go full crypto.


POLITICS

Supreme Court Rules in Favor of Scumbag

Last week, the Supreme Court took the letter of the law a little too seriously and the biggest losers were consumers.

AMG Services ran a huge payday lending scheme that deceived millions of customers out of A LOT of money.

The guy in charge was this motherf******:

It was your typical loan shark operation: they loan you $300 and charge $90 in interest for a total of $390.

Besides being an awful deal for the customer, there’s nothing illegal about that business model. Talk about margins!

BUT! The fine print explained that the loan would be renewed automatically unless customers jumped through a few hoops.

Nobody read the fine print.

The result? Millions of people ended up having to pay way more than they bargained for.

It was never a bargain.

The damage? $1.3B in deceptive charges between 2008-2012.

The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) filed suit in 2012 and a District Court ordered Tucker (AMG) to pay $1.27B in restitution (to consumers) and told him to stop doing shady shit.

Tucker appealed the decision, but the Ninth Circuit appropriately told him to get lost.

Justice served, right?

Wrong. Instead of getting lost, he sought certiorari. Asking the big court (Supreme) to review the little court’s (District) decision.

It was granted.

The decision after review from the highest court in the land?

9-0 win for the bad guy.

Unanimous! Not a single justice ruled against Tucker to make him pay back the people he swindled.

Why?

Because the language in the provision the FTC uses to make sure bad guys like Tucker don’t do bad shit like steal billions from unassuming consumers doesn’t explicitly say that the FTC can seek “equitable monetary relief such as restitution or disgorgement.”

Ayfkm?

There’s good news: the FTC has asked Congress to change the provision to grant them the power back to make the bad guys pay (with dollars).

Congress is already considering this to remedy the Supreme Court’s boner2.

AYFKM

Musk Triggers SNL, Cast Gets “Safe Space”

Last weekend it was announced that Elon Musk would be hosting SNL on May 8.

For reasons impossible to comprehend by a logical brain, that sparked a flurry of outrage online. I expect people were in between outrages and this looked too good to pass up?

Particularly outraged were some of the show’s cast members.

What were they so upset about? Apparently, they think Musk is too rich to host.

I’ll be honest, it’s good to finally know where SNL draws the line.

It’s not sexism (Andrew Dice Clay), or being boring as f**** (Al Gore, Bob Dole), or even MURDER (O.J. Simpson)!

It’s money.

If they (well-paid celebrities) think you’ve got too much of it, they don’t want you hosting!

Maybe they had a bad experience with Donald Trump?

To top off this pussification sundae, we’re now getting reports that the cast will have a designated “‘safe space’ if they’re too triggered to perform with Elon Musk.”

Ayfkm!?

This must be a joke, right? If it is then it’s the first good one SNL lands in a long time.

Either way, it’s great marketing for them because now I might actually tune in on May 8. I certainly wasn’t going to be watching it because I think the show is funny.


FINANCE

First Cannabis, Now This!? Wall Street is Experimenting with Psychedelics

On Tuesday, MindMed ($MNMD)3 became the second psychedelics company to be listed on the Nasdaq exchange.

They work with fun stuff like LSD, MDMA, psilocybin, ketamine, ibogaine, and other potent psychedelic substances.

But not like that.

“This is really a mental health play, this is not about making your Burning Man experience a better experience, we’re interested in treating mental health.” - JR Rahm, CEO MindMed

Companies like MindMed are using these taboo substances to help people with ADHD, anxiety, depression, PTSD, addiction, cessation, and other mental health issues.

And it works! Five minutes on Google and you’ll find plenty of scientific evidence supporting psychedelic-assisted therapy. More importantly, you’ll find some pretty moving real-world examples of the positive effects these types of treatments can have.

Like cannabis, psychedelics have had a negative stigma associated with them for decades, but now we have those same substances listed on the 2nd biggest exchange in the world!

Miles of regulatory, cultural, moral, sociological, and [fill-in-the-blank] obstacles remain, but it’s a massive step forward for mental health every time another one of these companies is listed.

Speaking of - ATAI Life Sciences will be going public soon, backed by Peter Thiel (PayPal, Palantir, Founders Fund, etc.). The drug development platform is seeking to raise $100M in its IPO.

Maybe cannabis is a gateway drug after all?

TL;DR: cannabis and psychedelic companies are not “fringe” investments anymore, they’re mainstream.


NFTs

Disaster Girl Is All Grown Up

Zoe Roth (aka Disaster Girl) is now 21 years old and she just sold the original image above as an NFT for almost HALF A MILLION DOLLARS!

Seriously.

Contrary to popular belief, Zoe did NOT start the fire.

The burning house was down the block from Zoe’s family’s house. The land was being cleared and it had been donated to local firefighters for a test burn.

Zoe’s dad had just bought himself a brand-new camera so of course, they went over to check out the fire and snap some photos.

He told her to “smile” and took this masterpiece, which he submitted to an “emotion capture” contest in JPG Magazine.

The rest is history.

I’ve got a feeling we might be seeing more of these types of NFTs soon…


IDIOT BUFFET
📈 A summary of the Berkshire Hathaway Annual Shareholders Meeting (Warren Buffet & Charlie Munger).
📊 “A Succinct Summation of Week’s Events for 4.30.21” = Economic events in a nutshell.
📈 Big Tech reports MONSTER earnings ($AMZN, $FB, $GOOGL, $AAPL, $MSFT).
🤦‍♂️ Florida family of entrepreneurs disrupt the medical industry with new COVID “miracle cure.”
Apple vs. Epic Games (Fortnite): summary of the biggest trial in tech that begins tomorrow.
🤦‍♂️ Wanker wants us to sacrifice our pets to save the planet. He can sod off.
💉 Miami private school anti-vax bozos.
😡 A BILLION genetically modified mosquitoes are set to be released in the Florida Keys.
📊 President Biden’s $4T economic plan in one chart.
🤦‍♂️ A $2B startup fired its CEO after he took LSD on the job.
🗯 Quote of the week: “It’s not a poop wall, it’s a compost fence.” - Man who literally built a shit wall to spite his neighbor.

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